E4 | Trust Isn’t Given, It’s Grown | Silvia Shin

so much for inviting me, Damian, this is really exciting opportunity for us to converse about building trust. Yeah.

So what I want to start is by asking you, as a leader, you have been working in the Los Angeles County Department of Public Health for many years, and you have been leading your team also for several years, what do you do as a leader to build trust with people that work for you, or your peers or even your bosses? Because I know that that changed too.

As you said, I've been in the department for a while, and all the lessons I have learned is through a lot of mistakes, right? I mean, we make a lot of mistakes, and we grow from it. When I was younger, when I was just a new supervisor, new manager, I was just looking back. I was really naive. Didn't really have a whole lot of confidence. I want to do everything right correctly. I wanted people to like me, and I want them to be happy. I want to perform right. It was the focus, was performance, and want to do everything right in such a way that, like, I want to have a perfect team and all that right? So one time I created this tool. I love tools, as you know. So I created this tool to, like, give feedback to my team members because I knew feedback was important. I love feedback from my managers, right? So I created this tool. I thought it was pretty cool. You know, that was really a good tool, and I used it with my team members, but unexpectedly, they were very, very upset. They're like, Well, you didn't tell us that you're going to use this tool and all that, right? So what I learned from that was, I did not engage them in decision making and developing this tool, right? So my big lesson there was, you know what? I broke that trust. I mean, we had a good relationship, at least I thought I had good relationship with my team members. But because of that mistake, the trust diminished a little bit, right? So I had to regain, rebuild that trust. So in doing so, I had to really regain the trust by engaging with them, asking for input. How do we want to do this and that moving forward, right? So that was a huge mistake, and at the end of the day, we turned out fine, right? It was a long process to rebuild, but it was a happy ending story, right?

And you know what? Syria, many times issues related to trust happen, not because it is a bad intention. Many times good intentions, and people may misinterpret people's intention, and as a result of that, can be a breach of trust. I shared in the book an experience I also have with a ball that I didn't mean not to inform her about the client that I was working with. I was part of her district, and the her boss knew, and she didn't know, and that made her look bad, and she was upset with me, and she told me, I cannot trust you. I said, I'm sorry. I forgot you know you were not any bad intention. And in this case, it's the same thing, either like you have a good intention, you want to provide something of value that is misinterpreted as you maybe, I don't know what was in their mind. Maybe you wanted to manipulate them. Or do you have other intentions? The good news is that you can rebuild that trust. And I think in an issue of engagement, collaboration and bringing people together is one of the ways that you build trust. So when people that you are interested in them, that you care about their opinion, so when you engage them in decision making, people are more committed, and they feel part of the process and the decision, and they're more committed to to whatever he decided. But in this case, it sounds like they felt excluded in some way, and they jumped to all of this wrong conclusion. But the good news is that it can be rebuilt, like it can be rebuilt. Yes, I agree with you. It takes a lot of work.

It does. Yeah, it took a lot of time and effort and my mental capacity, right? Mental energy, right? Because I felt like, oh my gosh, I'm not trustworthy anymore by my team members. And I was concerned. I thought that was just like the end of a relationship, but it wasn't. But like you said, intention is so important. And then I did a 360 evaluation one time, and that was the thing, intention, being clear on my intention was so important on my part, and also rebuilding that relationship, right? Because, yeah, I didn't have that intention, but I did not communicate my attention. So communicating that intention really builds trust.

Sylvia, over the years, you had to build trust with people that you didn't know as a leader when you had to build trust with colleagues, new people in your team or peers, or even a new boss. But what do you do to build trust? What has worked for you in your experience?

Yeah, I'm glad you asked that, because I feel like we need to build trust and connection as humans, not as a leader and a worker. So when I have new employees in my team, it doesn't matter if they're managers or line staff or individual contributors. They I meet with them one to one, even if it's 15 minutes, 30 minutes. I want to get to know them as human beings, right? I want to show them that I'm here for them and they're for me. We work together. We work towards the same mission for the organization, right? So I want to see them as people. My mantra is people first before the world.

Like many time you hear that in organizations like people say that, but they don't really mean it, but I know in your case, you do

yes exactly. So I want to get to know them as person. What do they like to do? How do they want to grow? Or do they not want to grow? And that's okay, right? Some people, they tell me, honestly, I'm at the end of my career. I want to enjoy what I do. I'm like, Okay, let's see what we can how we can work together on that really leverage that strength, right? So getting to know them as people, that's my priority in my work.

And I do believe that also getting to know people and being interested in them is another great way to build trust. As I like to do an exercise when I train leaders, and I ask them to think about the leaders they admire. Who are they that they admire, and bring what are their traits, what they have done that make them to admire them. And then the second part of the exercise, I ask them, how close and how far are you from them? You know, what are the things you're doing and what everything that you would like to do that you're not doing yet, that you would like to do, to be like them. And most of the times, something that always come up is that my leader care about me as a human being. They care me as I was a person, not just as somebody producing results. And what you're saying that interest in the other person make a huge difference in building relationship, and this is not a waste of time, because I hear sometimes also leaders say, No, I don't have time to small talk, or I don't have time to get to know people. But if you don't, if you don't invest time in getting to know your colleagues, what is the cost?

It's a huge cost. The trust is not there. It's non existent, right? Because I say, if I don't have a healthy human being, physically, mentally, emotionally, I cannot expect quality work or productivity, right? So we need to put our well being first so that they are able to produce, right? And we're not producing just for the sake of producing, just doing the war checking the box, but we're here for a good cause, right, public health. So,

so we're talking about building trust, and we talk about the importance of engaging people in decision making, in getting to know them. What has worked for you in the past in building trust?

I think what's another important aspect of building trust is being yourself and being honest, being transparent. I'm going to say, you know, right now, at the moment, our department and a lot of the parts of the country, we're facing a lot of challenges, uncertainty, fear, right? And we as a government sector, we're facing a lot of challenges right now, right? Uncertainty. We don't know what's going to happen with our budget. We don't know what's going to happen with people's jobs or their roles and how it's going to change, right? And the thing is, we don't know as leaders either what's coming. So while we're wanting to assure people that everything will be okay, we want them to be feeling okay and not be scared, but at the same time, we're scared too, right? We're not confident what's going to happen. We're uncertain. We're fearful. But instead of being inauthentic and just, you know, making stuff up or whatever, right? I want to be transparent, like I don't know everything right now, I don't know what's going to happen to you or me or us, right? But what I can promise is I will be transparent. I will share information as I know to my ability, right? And that way, they are feeling respected and they are being heard. And also my job is to raise the concerns that they have, to my leadership, to my management, right, so that they have their voice spoken through me, right, if they don't have that other platform, right? So in that way, I think it's that consistency caring you know about them as human being, not just as a worker, right? So I think that's one way to build trust and being honest, being open, and it's okay to be vulnerable, right? And that shows that you're human, too.

People ever say that? People ever say when they see that they can also share their own concerns, their own fears, their own uncertainties, versus showing like everything is in control, knowing that that's not happening

exactly. We're not perfect. We don't know everything, we don't have all the answers. We don't have the solutions, right? But I think getting on that same page with them, it's like, hey, you know? I. Understand that this could be really, really unsettling and scary, and I do feel scared, but we're going through this together as a leader. I'm here to message and deliver the message I as I know, right? And I'm not going to lie to you. I'm not going to sugarcoat things, right? It's as it is,

you are also showing that you understand what means to experience whatever they're going through, particularly with cats in government, not knowing what is going to if people are going to keep on other jobs, being able to make comments of support and empathy is another great way to build trust being empathetic and supportive, even in challenging times. Silvia, can you think of any other example where you had to build trust and creating a trusting environment at work?

Yeah, good question. Damien, I have a small team of unit here. I'm really proud of my team, because they are, they're here in this unit, working in this unit, because they want to be here. They love they're passionate about growth and development, training, learning, continuous learning, right? So even though we have small group, we have this sensibility of wanting to grow all the time, right? But it doesn't necessarily mean that people are wanting to stay in one place right here in the government sector, I don't know if you know, we cannot necessarily give people promotion in the same place. We can't just give them a salary, bonus or a promotion, right? But they need to grow. When they grow, they may need to go out of my team, beyond my team, right? So my strategy to help them grow and develop is to just make sure that they know what they want to accomplish, right? And they are, I'm here to support them to grow and develop, and they don't have to be here to grow and develop, because I may not have that capability, that ability to give them a promotion and whatnot, right? So celebrating new opportunity when it comes for them, and continually encouraging, encouraging them to apply for another position or promotion so that they can keep growing and expanding, and also giving them a stretch assignment so they can, you know, obtain new skills, right? And by doing that, it's creating that trust. And when they do go out of my team, and they grow and expand, sometimes they come back for another promotion within my team, because they, I have, you know, established that trust with them, and they love working in this positive work environment.

This is a great example about how you are committed to their growth development, not necessarily only your own benefits, because many time leader, they don't want their team members to leave. So thinking about their team, but in this case, you're also thinking about how you're growing and developing your people so they can go and have other opportunities. And that is a magnet for talent, because people want to work for people who are committed to the development beyond their own, let's say selfish interests about keeping people in their team?

Exactly, yeah, don't I the one lesson like, don't be attached to a person because they're gonna go and fly on their own one day. And but you know, you, you you have developed that trust, that trusting relationship. So that's that's priceless

to start wrapping up Sylvia, anything else for leaders listening to us.

Um, I think we cover a good part of that. I mean, my mantra, people, first before work, I cannot expect you to be a good worker without being a good, healthy human being. So see them as humans, right? I mean, ask them about their well being. What are their goals? What are their challenges? Listen to them with your full presence, right? They know when people when you're not being genuine, right? So be caring. They don't. You don't have to like everybody. That's not the point. But we're here to care. We're accomplishing our mission through our team members together, right? So creating that space, that psychological safety, that holding that container, I think that's a really important job as a leader, to build trust and leading with transparency. You don't have to be perfect. Just be yourself. Be caring. It's okay to be vulnerable.

Thank you, Sylvia. I really appreciate your time. Thank you for coming and participating in the PO. Podcast and sharing your wisdom and your experience in building trust, this is going to be really helpful for people listening to us, and I hope you can come back in the future to continue the conversation on other topics. Thank you, Damien, and that's a wrap up for today's LEAD with a coaching mindset. I am Damian Goldwater, thrilled to have shared this time with you. Don't forget to subscribe and give us a rating. Stay excited for more episodes. Take care and keep living with a coaching mindset. You.